Will u b my freind???

*I realize that 90% of the traffic on this site comes from search engine hits on/to the titles of my posts.  I realize misspelling stuff in the title stops traffic, but c’mon, do you really think someone who searches for “be my friend” wants to read about WoW?  It’s probably a good thing it’s not written correctly!*

So you’ve joined a new guild and you find yourself wondering just how in the world you are going to fit in with this new crowd.  After all, there are most likely already some couples (or e-couples), some groups of friends, some raiding groups, arena teams and pvp groups.  There are the “let’s alt together” people, there are the roleplayers, the Dalaran dancers, the fuck-around-all-day groups.  Countless subgroups and divisions exist in this guild and you are not part of any of them.  You don’t even know why they’re spamming “FTOOOOOOOOOL!” in /g but they do so regularly and then everybody rofls a lot. 

Seems the least bit familiar?  If not, then you’ve never joined a new guild or don’t remember when you joined your current one.  If so, well, read on, I will provide some very useless help.

Assuming you are joining a raiding guild (because I want to assume that), you are being unscrupulously analyzed by everyone.  They are instantly looking for a few things:

-are you retarded.
-are you well geared.
-are you better geared than me? (especially with those of your class)
-are you experienced
(we’ll go back to these later)

They already know basic information about you based on your guild application.  So your age, location, gaming habits, spelling ability… all known.  In most cases they already know if you’re a guy or a girl.  If not, you’ll probably be able to surprise them if you’re not a guy.  (Regularly happens to my guild, we all assume everyone who joins is a guy, but then it turns out that’s rarely the case).  That my 10 man raids over on Coilfang were 50% girls was understandable.  But that our 25 man raids are 50% girls if not more some nights, that’s pretty impressive in an activity that is commonly stereotyped as more male than female.

So since they know basic stuff about you, your next chance to get to know them is to do two things:  get involved by being obnoxious and interjecting yourself into every run/raid/battleground/conversation/group/vent, simply allow time to work for you.  Guess which option I think is better? –grin-

Obnoxious New Person VS Potentially Cool Person

Think back to school (or think ahead to school, god knows how old you are).  Did you like the new kid who glued his face to the teacher’s ass and constantly asked questions?  Fuck no.  Similarly, do you think anyone likes the new recruit who won’t stop harassing the officers and pointing out he/she is ready to step in at any time, can they listen in on vent, posting strats to fights on the forums and constantly talking on /g with questions on how the raid is going?  No.  Nobody does.

The potentially cool person is the one who doesn’t yap incessantly right when they join.  Why would they, they don’t know anyone!  In fact, the potentially cool person is the one who will be quiet more often than not the first few days as they get a grasp on guild dynamics.  It takes a bit of time to learn who is the target of guild jokes, who is the one making the jokes, who is the one that should be jokingly insulted and who is the one that dishes it out but can’t take it.  You really don’t want to cross anyone right when you join.  It’s like anything else, if you make a bad impression on anybody, it’s going to take a very long time to remedy.  You don’t have to make a GOOD impression, just leave yourself the best chance at people being neutral to you for the longest time possible.  Neutrality at the beginning is beautiful.  They don’t have to like, they just have to not dislike.

But Latus, how can I convince people to like me?

Go cut yourself emo boy!

You’ve joined a raiding guild.  There is one thing and one thing only that will make you liked:  raid well.  Your gear (going back to that list of 4 things earlier in the post) is known to everyone.  Chances are just about everyone in your role and most of the others have looked at your armory and inspected you before the raid.  They know what you are capable of in your gear and are looking to see if you underperform, perform neutrally, or exceed expectations.

The bad players underperform regularly.  The average-good players underperform on the first night and then go to their “they’re ok, I guess, no real complaints but they don’t wow anyone” mode afterwards.  The really good players will probably not be tremendous the first night, but after the first raid jitters settle, they’ll constantly amaze people that they’re able to do something a certain way.  To take two examples from my guild, I’ll go back to my beginnings and to a mage’s.

When I first joined, I was in mostly t9 gear with a 251 weapon and 232 gloves, bad trinkets.  The guild as a whole was in full t9 and had already had 2 months of ICC runs up to Putricide, so most were in mid t10.  My first raid was in ToGC and I did, by my standards, ok.  I was dead last in dps.  But my damage done wasn’t so atrocious, I was breaking the top 10.  Then on Putricide attempts, I would regularly be in the top 3 damage done (with low dps, warlocks, that fight, blah blah).  While nobody had to say anything, I (believe) that I was proving that the low performance relative to the raid on other fights was because of gear and experience with the group.  On a new fight, I was up there with the best despite being outgeared.  I think I was made into a regular part of the group very quickly upon joining.  Good impressions, and all that.

A mage joined after we had killed LK, and she came into the raid, topped the charts on a few fights and didn’t die too much.  Of course, she wasn’t assigned some of the jobs of established members, so of course the chart topping would happen, but that she could perform at that level was all that people needed to accept her into the raiding group almost instantly.

Oh a third example!  Someone in t9 gear joined not too long ago, and cannot break 2-3k dps.  No matter what else there is about this person, they’ll never be given a chance to be in the group because, well.. this is a raiding guild and this person clearly isn’t a good enough player.

Point is:  you joined a raiding guild so you better know everything about your class, your rotation, and how to squeeze everything out of your character when need be.  If you can’t, don’t join a raiding guild where you’ll be shunned pretty quickly!

So I can raid and that’s cool, what about the rest?

If you’ve managed to make yourself part of the raiding group, that’s perfect.  Now it’s up to you to decide if you’re the quiet one that never talks but raids well and that nobody knows anything about, or if you befriend some group members and treat is as fun even outside of raiding.  Time is usually the most important thing here.  The longer you are in the group, the more people are accustomed to seeing you there and start treating you as they do all the others who’ve been there a long time.  You also get to be present when “new” guild memes are made.  You get to hear the vent fights, you get to see the jokes made… essentially, you get to be a part of it all.  That’s not something you can force or speed up, it has to proceed at it’s own pace.

Is there anything I should / shouldn’t do?

Of course!  Here is “Good Idea / Bad Idea” list of things to do when you are the newb in a guild.  Please keep in mind that just as anything in the world, this is not always accurate and some people would respond differently than I imply.

Good Idea   Bad Idea
-talk on vent when you are asked a direct question relating to the raid.   -scream “OMG HELLO THIS IS LATUS I AM A WARLOCK HOW ARE YOU ALL DOING THIS IS EXCITING…” 10 times an hour on your first raid.
-make an occasional joke on vent after you’ve been there some time and people know you.   -make lewd comments at people on your first raid night. 
-talk to people in private about questions that come up.   -harass people in private with a million whispers, most resembling “hello are you still there?”
-participate in your guild forums, show you’re active and care.   -post a 10 page myspace thread about yourself on your guild forums.
-post a picture of yourself after you’ve been in the guild for some time IF your guild’s “RL PICS!” thread seems active and often used.    -post pictures of yourself repeatedly.  Or since day 1 of joining.  Establish yourself first.
-help people with their gaming; run heroics, pvp with them, provide your tradeskills.   -spam guild channels about “IF ANYONE NEEDS HELP LET ME KNOW IM RIGHT HERE”
    -if you’re a guy, freak out that there are girls in the guild.  In any way.
     

 

Is there a BEST way to make sure someone likes me?

Why, yes!  There is, make pictures for people that look like this:

Latusthegoat

❤ ❤ ❤ Ggrab!

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