3.2 Impressions continued, the sleep-deprived version

After that initial rush into the battlegrounds in which I now find myself 97 wins, 25 disarmed bombs and 1 destroyed siege engine away from the Isle of Conquest meta achievement, we finally made a foray into the new 5man. I don’t even know what it’s called. TOTC and TOC are the abbreviations we were using, and I know it’s something of the champion, but what? Meh!

My first attempt was on regular mode, solo. I’m disappointed that I can only ride a wolf. Sure, they’re neat, but there’s a reason all my mounts in-game are HORSES: they’re cooler to ride. Wolves have claws and horses have hooves. Hoofs. Hoovefes. Wolves go “grrr-grrrr-rrrrr” all the time while horses don’t. Horses eat carrots. And apples. And they suit my Undead form much better! But ok, fine, it’s still pretty damn cool.

Then I looked around and I saw Varian and Jaina on one side of the spectator stands. I thought it was odd, and obviously turned around to see none other than Thrall and that other orc that really hates Humans whose name I forget. Garrosh?
Anyways, yeah, I can pretend to believe that the Argent expedition to Northrend is completely nuts and thinks that a glorified UFC championship between living things in Northrend is the best way to defeat Arthas.

I can pretend to believe that we, as players, will champion their cause and ride gloriously into battle on our mounts, where all of Arthas’ necromancy will be powerless to stop our lances. On foot, it’s a different story, he kicks our ass. But when we’re on a horse! Wooah ho ho! Then we’re nigh unstoppable!

I can believe it, really!

BUT THAT THE LEADERS OF THE ALLIANCE AND HORDE HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING BETTER TO DO THAN COME WATCH GLADIATORIAL STYLE COMBAT IS JUST FUCKING STUPID!

/Ahem

But once I got over that, the event is pretty cool. I defeated the first wave of three riders and died to the second, thinking I’d be given some time to heal myself up. Unhappily, it dawned on me that maybe a 5man really was supposed to be run by 5 people.

So we got some guildies, went in, died a bunch to every new gimmick, and were awed that ilevel 219 loot was dropping. This was 10man Ulduar gear dropping in a 5man that probably won’t take more than 15 minutes to complete now that we understand how it works. Our guild’s 2nd tank (2nd only in that he actually has a viable dual spec) got a new main hand, our top Priest got a new necklace, our hunter got a pole arm, and I got a new dagger with a socket. A SOCKET. That means it instantly received a +19 spell power gem and this ilevel 219 caster dagger has 506 base spell power. That’s pretty damn nice! And it looks badass. I’d post screenshots, but I’m not at home currently… and I don’t do well with screenshots usually anyways. The point is: wow, phat lootz be thar!

We then formed up for 10man VoA to see the new boss, only to realize the new boss isn’t yet implemented since Season 7 hasn’t started. Forget that poor shmuck Koralon for now! We didn’t even do Emalon but went straight at the new 10man raids. We only had about 20 minutes worth of attempts but they went like this:

“Does anyone know strategy?” 9 people say no, 1 says he’s reading it.
That one asks if we want to hear it, to the resounding tune of 9 “no!”.

We then wipe a lot. Big mammoth guy runs out, stomps around, while little kobolds on his back throw fire everywhere and then jump on your back and go SCRITCH SCRATCH SCRITCH and interrupt spell casts. We get that they have to be focused and killed quickly. We actually managed to down all 5 scratchies, but our offtank was dead by then and it was just an inevitable spiral towards a wipe as we waited for our main tank’s impale dot to stack high enough to one shot him. Our hunter tried to pull the boss but did so too soon and would have had to hold aggro for 26 seconds. Wipe ensued, and delighted and entertained, we went out separate ways.

Ainara’s computer crapped out and wouldn’t let her play with less than 9000 latency, but I logged her on my laptop and just had her follow 4 of us as we did the heroic daily, netting each of us our first 2 Emblems of Triumph in preparation for our beautiful welfare tier 9. I don’t see us finding the dedication and passion to run regular raids again any time soon and get actual gear.

I bought new boa chest pieces for my druid, the cloth chest so that it would get the most use possible between him and other toons, and I bought my warrior twink the plate one. Then I logged on and heard one of the best twinks on COilfang say “I’ve been in queue 27 minutes now…” and a horrible realization hit me. Non-premade twinking is done for. I will rant on this in a moment.

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